Nancy Gosse ~ Journey of Truth

Under continuous evolution as I learn more ...

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Saturday, March 27, 2010

Carnelian Life

I have been living my life like a carnelian, continually changing, growing, transforming, and many times over finding myself figuratively standing at that corner looking at numerous signs pointing me in different directions and asking myself, which way do I want to choose? Asking myself who I am has become a checking in point for me because in any given moment I am not sure if I am the same as I was a moment before.

I quite often find myself, like I am right now, sitting in a coffee shop, staring out the window at the life that is passing by. Cars driving up and down the street, people milling about, some smiling, some frowning, and some looking agitated, some looking pensive, some looking very sad and lost. They are all me. They are all aspects of where I have been or where I am heading. What are they looking for? Where are they trying to get to? Why?

Then I see the lone guy sitting on the corner holding a sign; "spare change for food?" Kinda puts things in a different perspective doesn’t it? But then, there are questions for that too. Why doesn’t he have food? What did he do with the money he had? Why isn’t he out there busting his butt like the rest of the working sops earning a living for himself? Yeah, right! How many times have those working sops wrung up their hands in frustration and proclaimed that I’d rather be laying on a beach somewhere never having to work again. The only difference between that lone guy on the corner and that guy in the office is perhaps that the lone guy on the corner has a simpler and more straightforward perspective on life. Maybe that guy on the corner is actually a wise old Buddha. It’s really quite simple!

I look to the side street and see a spiffy green mustang parked behind a rusted old ford truck. What’s the difference between them? What kind of life do the drivers experience? I can imagine the driver of the mustang dolled up in their finest garb having to look like they have some status. The driver of the rusty old ford wears denim, muddy boots, and a jacket that’s patched on the elbows. Perhaps. When I look again I see a well dressed young lad, walking with confidence as he approaches his old rusty truck. He steps into his chariot with an air of contentment. The driver of the mustang however, is hunched, looking worried, stressed. He probably broke the bank by investing in his car. Now he can’t afford new shoes. There’s something to be said for tried and true and getting your money’s worth from old reliable.


snapshots of my recent journey

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